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Trolling The Nation for Cowboys vs. Eagles: “Where can I get one of them ‘Beat Dallas’ shirts?”

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By: One.Cool.Customer

Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images

Read what other fans had to say as they watched the Cowboys dismantle the Eagles.

Here’s your chance to relive what fans of other NFL teams were thinking while they were watching the Cowboys take apart the Eagles – via the comments made by those fans while watching the game.

Enjoy.

Disclaimer: All quotes are taken directly from the open game threads from the SB Nation team sites as indicated in front of every comment. Some minor edits have been made to improve the overall legibility of the quotes and to satisfy our site guidelines, but no other changes have been made, no commentary added.

First Quarter
Eagles With a win tonight, we can completely change the conversation about the 2021 season.
TSPC37730 | 07:26 PM
Eagles This game is definitely winnable, so let’s put in a performance and win it.
RobTheEaglesFan | 07:38 PM
Dolphins Dallas 42 – Eagles 21. Book it.
holland182 | 07:45 PM
Eagles Someone should tell this Post Malone fellow that his friends drew on his face with Sharpie markers.
Jarvin Driftwood | 08:02 PM
Eagles If they lose tonight I’m going to kill myself and none of you can stop me.
Slippin’Jimmy89 | 08:11 PM
KICKOFF
Eagles What kind of defense was that? Everyone knew it would be a run … OMG now a big catch!
Joey0210 | 08:20 PM
(11:52) E.Elliott up the middle for 1 yard, TOUCHDOWN
Cowboys 7 – Eagles 0
Eagles Looks like I’ll be in bed early tonight.
joey2times | 08:21 PM
Saints I wish we had CeDee Lamb.
JRick’s Burner Account | 08:21 PM
Eagles Not a great start.
grantspectations | 08:22 PM
Eagles Gonna need Hurts to respond, if he wants to be the guy he needs to respond with a TD.
HakunaMailata | 08:22 PM
Eagles Well we know the defense was going to get abused. Nothing changes right now.
AscendedGodEssenceFoles | 08:23 PM
Eagles The Eagles’ secondary is atrocious. There is literally NO ONE who can cover any halfway decent receiver.
nononono | 08:25 PM
(10:48) J.Hurts pass deep right INTERCEPTED by A.Brown at DAL 1.
Eagles Yikes. Might be a long night.
eagleonmars | 08:27 PM
Eagles That looked like an interception from the start.
RBHeadge | 08:27 PM
Eagles This is gonna be a bloodbath.
Kwahu | 08:28 PM
Eagles He has the Wentz look lmao.
AscendedGodEssenceFoles | 08:28 PM
Eagles They got curb stomped the previous 2 games at Dallas. Looks like its gonna be another one.
Relyes | 08:30 PM
(10:04) D.Prescott sacked. FUMBLES, RECOVERED by PHI-F.Cox. TOUCHDOWN
Cowboys 7 – Eagles 7
Eagles LETSSS GOOOOO!!!!!
eagleonmars | 08:31 PM
Eagles Fletcher Cox finally did something! Lol
eagleonmars | 08:31 PM
Eagles Let the lines settle in. We gonna be in this cause our lines are better.
Revenge of Weapon X | 08:33 PM
Eagles We comin’ for you Dallas!
djpheel | 08:35 PM
Eagles I’m still concerned we can’t stop the Cowboys offense.
travisfulgoat | 08:36 PM
Eagles Injuries everywhere. I still think we have a corrupt medical staff. Needs an investigation.
ferventPundit1 | 08:38 PM
Eagles I think he clipped his hand on Zeke’s Ewok leg…bruised or broken fingers is my bet…
phillyphanatic10 | 08:38 PM
Dolphins So this is what offensive lines do? They stop people from getting the QB?
Used to be Fuhbawl | 08:40 PM
Eagles It would be cool if the defense could play well for more than a play or two.
rodeojones000 | 08:41 PM
Eagles Zeke is strong boy.
PhillyEagles2011 | 08:43 PM
Eagles This team has a serious discipline problem man.
Bleedgreen93 | 08:43 PM
Eagles Still hoping we can hold them under five (5) yards on one (1) rush.
ComestippleSacksoun | 08:43 PM
Eagles 50-10 time of possession incoming.
zracer71 | 08:44 PM
(5:50) D.Prescott up the middle to PHI 1 for no gain. Dallas challenged the short of the goal line ruling, and the play was Upheld.
Eagles QB SNEAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Joey0210 | 08:45 PM
Eagles Wowwww. I hope this call holds up lol.
eagleonmars | 08:46 PM
Eagles He got it. Wow. Bad call.
zracer71 | 08:46 PM
Eagles Depends on when they blew the whistle but it looked like he got it.
Hi I’m Dave | 08:47 PM
Eagles They’re going to call that a TD.
RBHeadge | 08:47 PM
Eagles Let’s see how much Jerry Jones paid these officials…
JASON KELCE | 08:48 PM
Eagles That’s definitely a TD.
rodeojones000 | 08:48 PM
Eagles Wow I 100% thought they were gonna call that a TD.
I Shittu Not | 08:51 PM
Eagles I feel for Dallas fans there. We would be just as mad as them.
zracer71 | 08:51 PM
Eagles Offense stinks.
eagleonmars | 08:52 PM
Eagles Are the RBs dressed?
David Okinsky | 08:52 PM
Steelers Is Jalen Hurts supposed to be good?
Toronto Steeler Fan | 08:52 PM
PHI punts
Eagles Hurts = trash. Sorry but he’s no better than Carson.
JASON KELCE | 08:53 PM
Eagles Dallas avg like 8 yds on 1st down.
Southparkeagles | 08:56 PM
Eagles If our D-line doesn’t get a stuff it’s a guaranteed 5+ yard run.
PhillyGrit23 | 08:56 PM
(1:36) D.Prescott pass deep right to D.Schultz for 19 yards, TOUCHDOWN
Cowboys 14 – Eagles 7
Eagles This game is over.
insaneeaglesfanatic | 08:58 PM
Eagles Look guys…they have the best WR corps in the league…They will destroy teams w/ weak LB corps.
phillyphanatic10 | 08:59 PM
Eagles Yep, Week 1 was a fluke.
phillyeagleGuy | 08:59 PM
Eagles Too easy. Sadly, I don’t think there’s any way we’re winning this game.
eagleonmars | 08:59 PM
Eagles Remember when no one would dare run the ball on us? That was only three years ago. Feels like three decades.
RBHeadge | 09:00 PM
Eagles At least this probably means I don’t have to stay up late to watch this game.
rodeojones000 | 09:00 PM
Eagles What happened to the defense ??!!!
Phillysf | 09:00 PM
We can’t play Atlanta every week.
EaglesBlitzed | 09:00 PM
Tired and overmatched. Not necessarily in that order.
Southparkeagles | 09:00 PM
The Cowboys offense happened.
ImminentDomination | 09:00 PM
That’s a scary good offense that’s had the ball the entire game.
Bleedgreen93 | 09:00 PM
Steelers What is this handing the ball to a running back and getting 8 yards a crack? Seems so very strange and foreign to this Steelers fan. And using two running backs to keep them fresh, one speedy and one bulldozer? What is this strange usage?
Subura-nation | 09:00 PM
Eagles I wonder if we’ll even pass Dallas’s 1st Qtr totals for first downs and rushing yards by the end of the game.
EagleRock66 | 09:02 PM
Eagles Offense needs to sustain a drive so the defense can at least have a chance to get a sip of water.
iNoms | 09:02 PM
Jets This is a dangerous Dallas Offense. They protect the QB well. They can pound it. They can go deep. They have TEs. Pretty much everything.
Broadway Jose | 09:02 PM
Eagles I feel like we could beat the Bears. Maybe.
MustbeaVulcan | 09:03 PM
Eagles Damn they made a cartoon about how quickly we got back to sucking. COLD!!!
Calm & Cents | 09:04 PM
Steelers Positive yards on a screen. Who knew that was a thing?
Pittsblitz56 | 09:04 PM
PHI punts
Eagles Looks like we’re punting this game. Dallas are playing like they’re in the NFCCG for the first time in the 21st century.
Kwahu | 09:06 PM
WFT I was really hoping this wouldn’t be a blowout. Eagles needs a stop.
Czechurself | 09:06 PM
Panthers Eagles defense facing their 1st truly good passing attack and look totally lost while Dak picks them apart.
Dcangio09 | 09:06 PM
Second Quarter
Eagles The Cowboys didn’t need halftime to have Jalen completely figured out. It’s going to be a long night.
Starkad2 | 09:08 PM
Eagles The Eagles’ secondary may be the worst in the NFL. There wasn’t a DB within 5 yards of the TE. Easiest TD catch that guy will probably ever have.
nononono | 09:09 PM
Eagles Hurts field vision is bad, like really bad.
kory raymond | 09:09 PM
Jets ‘boyz look as solid as they have in years, and Parsons is a stud.
jericho crotchery | 09:09 PM
Eagles And there’s Derek Barnett with yet ANOTHER braindead penalty. I swear he gets 2 of those in every game.
nononono | 09:12 PM
WFT I feel like I am watching our defense. Can the Eagles stop anything?
LucasO | 09:13 PM
Steelers They use their 4th wide receiver on pass routes?
Pittsblitz56 | 09:13 PM
Who knew that he could be an eligible receiver?
Toronto Steeler Fan | 09:16 PM
Eagles Shut it off. No sense in watching now.
ferventPundit1 | 09:15 PM
Eagles This is embarrassing to get our butts whipped on National TV like this.
Joey0210 | 09:16 PM
Eagles Over/Under how many times they say “Dak is in complete control”
phillyphanatic10 | 09:16 PM
Giants Man the Cowboys doing the stuff that is working over and over and over again? What is this competency…
NYJG | 09:17 PM
(7:13) E.Elliott up the middle for 3 yards, TOUCHDOWN
Cowboys 20 – Eagles 7
Eagles Hard to watch. The stink is everywhere.
fegerter | 09:18 PM
Eagles KC is going to score 70 pts against us.
ToddSK | 09:19 PM
Eagles Dallas hasn’t even started throwing the ball yet…(minus the first series). They’re going to put a 40 burger on us…easy.
phillyphanatic10 | 09:19 PM
Eagles At least the Eagles were 4-0 in practice sessions.
VegasRed | 09:20 PM
Jets I hope Jets offensive line is watching MNF. See the Cowboys. That’s called blocking.
Charlie_IMHO | 09:21 PM
Eagles Cowboys will win by 21. Eagles are hot trash, along with the rest of the division.
The_EuroDiver | 09:22 PM
Jets Dallas has scored 3 touchdowns (actually 4 but the refs screwed them) and it’s not even close to half time yet. Jets haven’t scored 3 touchdowns all season.
Jeremy J. Jackson | 09:22 PM
PHI punts
Eagles PFF is watching Hurts and vomiting.
Greasy Meale | 09:26 PM
Eagles I’ve already seen enough from Hurts. Minshew taking his job by mid season
titsa_flappin | 09:26 PM
Eagles I am glad the Cowboys have made it clear who is going to win the NFC least this season. We are so outclassed it is not even funny.
jXn | 09:27 PM
Eagles My Sundays for the next few months are more and more looking pretty open
Benc14322 | 09:28 PM
Eagles How much exactly does Houston want for Deshaun Watson?
macvicta | 09:30 PM
Eagles Good thing they fired Doug. Otherwise they might be in real trouble.
YouCannotBeSerious | 09:30 PM
DAL punts
Eagles Hurts is playing at his average. Pass completion 44%
VegasRed | 09:34 PM
Eagles Can’t wait until Jalen Reagor-mortis is off this team
toobis | 09:34 PM
Eagles I have to laugh. Otherwise I might burst into tears over how pathetic this team looks
nononono | 09:37 PM
Eagles Bro we are straight ass
SuperGrover87 | 09:37 PM
Eagles This team does not look ready to play.
Ziggy2020 | 09:38 PM
Eagles Punt it now. We can’t convert this. We try to convert and we’ll just turn it over.
andyb | 09:39 PM
Eagles There’s zero flow to the play calling, we aren’t establishing anything.
kory raymond | 09:39 PM
Panthers Ooof Dallas is making an absolute joke of this Philly squad.
SoFaReal | 09:39 PM
Eagles Cowboys offense came out here with a game plan and is executing it. Out coached on both sides so far tonight.
kory raymond | 09:40 PM
Eagles Well it’s nice that Mike McCarthy had no interest in trying to score before the half.
JasonB | 09:42 PM
Eagles I have no idea why Mike McCarthy didn’t call a TO, especially with us punting on our side of the field.
HakunaMailata | 09:43 PM
He’s either a dope or taking mercy on us. Probably a dope.
sirpaulj7 | 09:44 PM
Eagles Our punter is seriously our best player
Philadelphia Eagles 521 | 09:43 PM
End Of Half
Eagles This coaching staff is on their way to short careers.
andyb | 09:46 PM
Eagles Reminder that our offense has scored ZERO points tonight.
(Un) | 09:47 PM
Eagles Hurts is Tebow 2.0.
PhillySports215 | 09:48 PM
Eagles You need a heat seeking missle at linebacker to neutralize the Zeke. Same story the last couple of years. He always runs all over us.
SkiLow | 09:50 PM
Eagles Dak has only missed 3 passes. Def line getting moonwalked on. Offense is nonexistent. Ah well.
Kenneth Masters | 09:52 PM
Eagles Dallas has played easier preseason games I’m guessing.
Fenton_Hardy | 09:54 PM
Third Quarter
Eagles They look much faster than we do.
Testes Rex | 09:58 PM
(14:07) J.Hurts pass short left INTERCEPTED by T.Diggs. T.Diggs for 59 yards, TOUCHDOWN.
Cowboys 27 – Eagles 7
Eagles Alright good night everyone!
Sangre-verde | 10:01 PM
WFT Sigh…Cowbys defense was supposed to be trash but I guess coaching matters.
Demj | 10:03 PM
Eagles Ran Doug out of town for Howie The Weasel Roseman. What a city.
phuckdallass | 10:04 PM
Eagles Sirianni is looking like a really, really bad hire.
soundbones | 10:04 PM
WFT If we don’t get our crap together Dallas will run away with the division.
chambers716 | 10:04 PM
Falcons So can Dan Quinn actually coach a defense? His Cowboys D is looking better than anything he produced here.
Kennycaine | 10:04 PM
Eagles Mercy rule.
sirpaulj7 | 10:05 PM
Eagles (stunned comments silence)
Calm & Cents | 10:07 PM
Eagles Burn. It. Down. Purify this abomination with fire and start over.
Fenton_Hardy | 10:09 PM
PHI punts
Eagles Someone explain to me the playcalling.
big DUB | 10:11 PM
Someone should explain it to Siriani first
MustbeaVulcan | 10:11 PM
DAL punts
Eagles Can the Eagles even beat Football Team?
The_EuroDiver | 10:13 PM
WFT vs. WTF
sirpaulj7 | 10:13 PM
Eagles I don’t like standing up for Dallas but they hung with the Super Bowl champs in Tampa and beat a very good Chargers team.
EastonAssassin63 | 10:14 PM
Eagles The scary part is I’m just as concerned with the HC as the QB
Howie Roseman BFF | 10:14 PM
Eagles The beer doesn’t even taste good tonight.
sirpaulj7 | 10:15 PM
Eagles Dan Quinn doesn’t even respect Hurts’ ability to throw, this man is still playing with 8 in the box.
phillyeagleGuy | 10:17 PM
Seahawks Could have brought Dan Quinn back…..
Bad Order | 10:21 PM
(7:08) J.Hurts pass to Z.Ertz for 3 yards, TOUCHDOWN.
Cowboys 27 – Eagles 14
Eagles A little dignity for us on that TD
Kwahu | 10:23 PM
Eagles Dallas let up that drive, went into a soft prevent
EaglesBlitzed | 10:25 PM
Eagles Hey guys, just stopped by Big Blue View, and they are all laughing at and making fun of the Eagles right now. The Giants.
The_EuroDiver | 10:25 PM
Jets What is this thing when the ball carrier goes into the end of the field where the numbers stop? I don’t recognize it.
Jetison | 10:27 PM
DAL punts
PHI punts
Lions T Diggs is going to make the Pro-Bowl just based on this game.
Singledigit | 10:35 PM
Eagles Diggs outplaying Smith is brutal. Worst part of the night.
Kwahu | 10:36 PM
Eagles I wanted to draft Diggs badly. We drafted Hurts 2 picks later.
Joey0210 | 10:36 PM
Eagles Can anyone figure out why McCarthy is running hurry up? Is he trying to help? His clock management is utterly bizarre
TheWentzAndFutureKing | 10:37 PM
Eagles Elliott playing like it’s 2016
Kwahu | 10:40 PM
Fourth Quarter
Eagles I hate this game. It is the third game of the season. Both of these things can be true.
ATX_Birds | 10:43 PM
Eagles Doug Pederson is eating ice cream on his couch laughing his ass off right now
I Shittu Not | 10:44 PM
(11:34) D.Prescott pass short right to C.Wilson for 2 yards, TOUCHDOWN.
Cowboys 34 – Eagles 14
Eagles DALLAS SUCKS!
TSPC37730 | 10:47 PM
But they’re killing us!
Thomas Jackson | 10:48 PM
We suck more!
Mike Mo Mo Mo | 10:48 PM
Eagles Game over. Period.
djpheel | 10:48 PM
Eagles I drafted Dallas players in my fantasy league to feel better about games like this lol
FoxStew | 10:48 PM
Eagles This is embarrassing to get our asses kicked this bad
Joey0210 | 10:49 PM
Eagles Anybody else disappointed by Devonta Smith? He looks outplayed by Diggs. That’s the most disappointing thing about this game.
Kwahu | 10:50 PM
Eagles Hopefully Kellen Moore takes an interview next year for the Eagles head coaching job
SkiLow | 10:50 PM
Eagles The Giants fans are saying they will drag the Eagles
The_EuroDiver | 10:51 PM
WFT Trevon Diggs just made his name in this game. Had no idea he’d turn out this good as I thought he was too overshadowed by Stefon. Kid looks like a top 5 CB.
JimmyWall | 10:51 PM
Packers So glad I’m not an Eagles fan right now.
purplesaltyqueso | 10:52 PM
Eagles Two straight weeks against a depleted defense and we have two touchdowns to show for it
Justyn L. | 10:53 PM
Eagles We won’t win more than 4 games. It will be hard to discern if it’s a true tank job.
phillyphanatic10 | 10:54 PM
Eagles Really depressing staying up for this from the UK – it’s 4:00AM and I’ve got work in a few hours
TheWentzAndFutureKing | 10:55 PM
You stay and watch like the rest of us!
The_EuroDiver | 10:55 PM
I’m in Italy, it’s freaking 5am here!
Antani101 | 10:55 PM
I’m in friggin Japan, it’s noon on Tuesday lol.
The_EuroDiver | 10:55 PM
Eagles I have never witnessed a game where a pro team refuses to even try to run the ball. The OC is a joke.
Darrrkness | 10:56 PM
Eagles I’ve missed most of the game until now and looking at the box score I think it’s a misprint that we only have 2 carries not by a QB. Cmon man.
Oakee | 10:58 PM
Eagles Maybe stop targeting their best DB worth a try
Joey0210 | 10:58 PM
(8:26) 4th-and-10: J.Hurts sacked at PHI 31. Turnover on downs
(7:05) D.Prescott pass short right to D.Schultz for 22 yards, TOUCHDOWN.
Cowboys 41 – Eagles 14
Eagles No one was within 10 yards of their TE who has been shredding them all night…
iNoms | 11:04 PM
Eagles This is the worst loss to the Cowboys I’ve ever seen in my lifetime as a fan.
Kwahu | 11:04 PM
WFT Eagles are a turd sandwich.
Hoggy_Style | 11:04 PM
Eagles I have stopped the pain. Silence is now golden.
sleepy in Hong Kong | 11:05 PM
Eagles We can all take some solace in the upcoming Dallas “this is our year” overreaction to beating the stuffing out of what is not a very good Eagles team
johntology | 11:05 PM
Eagles Where can I get one of them “Beat Dallas” shirts?
rocketcoe | 11:06 PM
Eagles 41 – 14 … and the game isn’t even that close.
sirpaulj7 | 11:07 PM
Eagles Chiefs-Eagles game will be moved to Comedy Central.
rocketcoe | 11:08 PM
Eagles Fire everyone. The coaches, general manager, waterboys, maintenance workers. And bench all the players. Put in Gardner Minshew.
VegasRed | 11:10 PM
Jets Cowboys have more than twice as many points tonight as the Jets have on the season
Jeremy J. Jackson | 11:11 PM
Jets So glad Philly drafted a WR in the first round so Hurts can throw to everybody BUT him.
JoCaT33 | 11:12 PM
(3:19) J.Hurts pass to G.Ward for 15 yards, TOUCHDOWN .
Cowboys 41 – Eagles 21
Eagles Garbage time TD.
HakunaMailata | 11:15 PM
Eagles If you squint it’s basically a 2 score game
AscendedGodEssenceFoles | 11:15 PM
Eagles Really tried to give Hurts a chance but I’m feeling like I did at the end of last season. Mind boggling anyone has the balls to walk around wearing his jersey.
andyb | 11:17 PM
Eagles I don’t see us winning a game until after Thanksgiving
phillyphanatic10 | 11:19 PM
DAL punts
Eagles The focus after this game has to be squarely on Howie. The team needs to be built to beat Dallas to win the division. He didn’t seem to consider that at all.
grndg | 11:22 PM
(0:54) 4th-and-5: J.Hurts scrambles for 4 yards. Turnover on downs
Seahawks Dan Quinn’s D looks good.
HawksRocks | 11:27 PM
End Of Game
Eagles I can’t remember a worse Eagles team than the one I just saw.
TheMammoth | 11:30 PM
Eagles Maybe this will finally be the season Lurie gets rid of Howie.
iNoms | 11:34 PM
Eagles Rookie head coach or not, calling 3 designed run plays in 4 quarters of football is inexcusable.
HamMcVick12-5-7 | 11:41 PM
WFT The Wowboys might go to the damn Super Bowl.
Teflong Dong | 01:24 AM

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Originally posted on Blogging The Boys